Fear-Based vs. Intuition-Based Decisions: How to Tell the Difference

The Time I Trusted My Gut (And It Changed Everything)

When I first landed as a backpacker in New Zealand, my highest priority was finding work. This was the first country I had a working visa for after 10 months of traveling, and let’s just say—it wasn’t just me, but also my bank account that was desperate for some income.

Like many, I arrived in Auckland and immediately started job hunting. Actually, scratch that—I had already been job hunting while I was still in Malaysia.

One of my first opportunities? A commission-based gig selling oil paintings door-to-door in Auckland suburbs. Any questions on why I didn’t take that one? 😅

So, I did what every backpacker does—I scoured every job platform I could find. Within days, I had a handful of interviews and even straight job offers without a single in-person meeting:

✅ Waitressing (I had zero hospitality experience)

✅ Bartending (I mean… ZERO)

✅ Receptionist at various hostels

✅ Helping out on a scuba dive boat

For someone who had always believed that finding a job was hard, I was shocked at how quickly opportunities showed up. But the problem? None of them sparked anything in me.

That’s when I remembered a conversation I had a few weeks earlier with a girl I met at a yoga retreat in Thailand. I had told her what a miracle it was to get a New Zealand working visa as an Austrian and that I wanted to use it for something special—

“I’d love to be a host, work in a B&B somewhere on the South Island, bake fresh bread, look after the chickens, connect with upper-level guests, and live a wholesome, slow-paced life.”

Then I had laughed it off, because… why would a small, family-run lodge hire a backpacker? They do everything themselves, right?

And yet, here I was in Auckland, turning down job after job—not because I was picky, but because none of them felt right. I actually felt guilty for rejecting opportunities, thinking about all the Austrians who applied for a working visa and didn’t get one.

But deep down, I knew I had to wait.

And then, three days later—the job ad of my dreams went online.

Lodge Assistant at a Boutique B&B on the South Island.

To be exact, in the sunniest town of the South Island.

Long story short—this was why I had turned down everything else. Because I was meant to become the new Lodge Assistant at exactly this place. And before I could blink, I packed my backpack and hit the road for a South Island road trip—heading toward a tiny village named Hope, which would be my home for the next six months.

But it turned out to be so much more than just a job.

Hope was where I met my now-husband.

Hope was where I found my vision and mission.

Hope was where I truly got to know myself.

And that little town, which I almost didn’t wait for, will forever hold a special place in my heart.

Fear-Based vs. Intuition-Based Decisions

Looking back, I realise that if I had let fear make my decision, I would have taken the first job that paid my rent. I would have let my bank balance dictate my next step instead of trusting that something better was coming.

That’s the difference between fear-based and intuition-based decision-making.

Fear-Based Decisions Feel Like:

🚩 Overthinking every possible outcome

🚩 Choosing what feels “safe” instead of what feels right

🚩 Making decisions out of urgency instead of trust

🚩 Feeling restricted, anxious, or stuck

🚩 Saying yes because you feel guilty for saying no

💡 Example:

You get offered a job that pays well but makes you feel uneasy. You take it anyway because you’re afraid you won’t get another offer. That’s fear talking.

Intuition-Based Decisions Feel Like:

✨ A deep, inner knowing (even if it doesn’t fully make sense yet)

✨ A feeling of expansion, excitement, or calmness

✨ Trusting that things will unfold, even with uncertainty

✨ A quiet confidence, even if there’s nervousness

✨ Saying no to what isn’t right—even if it means waiting a little longer

💡 Example:

You turn down a job that looks great on paper but doesn’t feel aligned. A week later, your dream opportunity appears. That’s intuition guiding you.

How to Tell the Difference Between Fear & Intuition

When making a decision, ask yourself:

Does this choice feel restrictive or expansive?

• Fear makes you feel small, stuck, or pressured.

• Intuition gives you a sense of possibility or alignment.

Am I choosing out of fear or trust?

• Fear makes you say yes because of scarcity.

• Intuition makes you say yes because it feels right.

If I weren’t afraid, what would I choose?

• This question alone often brings instant clarity.

What to Do When Fear is Holding You Back

1️⃣ Pause & Breathe – Fear thrives on urgency. Slow down and check in with yourself.

2️⃣ Visualise Both Options – Imagine yourself choosing Option A vs. Option B. Which one feels lighter, more aligned, or exciting?

3️⃣ Take a Small Step – If intuition is guiding you toward something, take a tiny action in that direction. It builds trust.

4️⃣ Remind Yourself: You Can Always Pivot – Most decisions aren’t forever. Trusting yourself means knowing you can adjust along the way.

If I had made a decision out of fear, I never would have ended up in Hope.

I never would have met my husband.

I never would have experienced one of the most transformative chapters of my life. Surely, there would have been other experiences waiting for me in Auckland, but ultimately I was meant to make the experiences in Hope and by listening to my intuition, I took a shortcut.

So, the next time you’re faced with a choice, ask yourself:

“Am I making this decision out of fear, or is my intuition guiding me?”

Because the best decisions—the ones that shape your growth, happiness, and fulfilment—aren’t the ones rooted in fear. They’re the ones rooted in trust. 💫

✨ Have you ever struggled to tell the difference between fear and intuition?

Let’s chat in the comments!